If you opened this article because of its title, I really admire your
confidence in telling the world that you have kissing issues! Don’t look
over your shoulder to see if someone behind you just read what you just
read on the screen! Well odds are they probably have kissing issues too
! How many times has a date ended with you expecting a kiss only to get
a handshake or hug? Bullocks! It fucking sucks (pardon my language I
just can’t hide the passion)! You probably head out home after that with
a sense of unfinished business.
The fact of the matter is if you do the right things or say the right stuff to him/her during the date, the kiss is guaranteed! Trust me, I know! I’ve been there! Unless your date is King Tsonga, ruler of Kuvukiland, you actually have a more than probable chance of closing your date with a successful kiss! Afterall he/she had to at least “like” something about you before agreeing to a date with you! So that should be a confidence booster! The remainder of how your date goes and ends determines if you’ll win the raffle! Ok… where do we start? We start from the beginning! Let your intentions be known from the onset.
Don’t let your date be “shocked” by your attempted kiss. I’ve seen
too many attempts go bad because the initiator “pulled a fast one” or
“was too sneaky” with the kiss. Don’t act all evening like you aren’t
going to kiss her/him and then all of a sudden pull you lips out like a
madman! You’ll frighten him. The shock could kill some people! Imagine
how your case will play in court – MURDER WITH AN ATTEPMTED KISS! So the
point is to lay the intentions out early! How do you do this? Well its
actually a couple of things… you could drop hints that you’re
interested. You could put out some subtle signals that you’re angling
for a kiss without coming right out and saying it! First,intentionally
allow yourself get caught looking at the other person’s lips. Then lick
your own lips briefly! My word! Don’t lick your lips like scooby – do on
some scooby snacks level! Just moisten it without disrupting the flow
of the conversation.
Repeat the action innocently about 2 more times during the date! The date is progressing well and you are probably tired of licking your lips! What do you do now? Don’t forget that its a date and not just about kissing your date. If you turn the night into an obsession about kissing you’ll come off as another pervert! Keep the evening nice with conversation and jokes and then… If you’re feeling brave, test the waters with a small kiss on the hand or the cheek. If the other person seems interested, it’s probably safe to proceed with a kiss on the mouth. Stop it if the person draws away… you’ll probably face sexual harassment charges if you don’t! Now Guys, If you’re kissing a girl be sure to first take her hand and slowly lift it to your mouth. Gently press your lips into the back of your hand for 2 or 3 seconds! Girls , your job is to lean in and plant a 2- or 3-second kiss on his cheek. Keep your lips soft, and avoid puckering like you would if you were kissing a family member. If you want your intentions to be extra clear, aim for the part of his cheek just to the side of his lips! Your night is going good. You are almost there! What’s the next step? Simple! Don’t waste any time once you have the go-ahead — close your eyes, lean in and smooch! Or not! I was kidding about the closing your eyes part! Unless you have memorized the geography of her face ,don’t fly blind! You might land on unclaimed territory, say the nose! Or ran your fore head again hers- then what?! Say sorry?! Just keep your eyes open till you have a gentle but firm grip on her lips! Now smooch away!!!!
The article has ended. You’ve kissed! So why am I still writing… Its not over yet… I took the liberty of asking a few good friends what they hate most about kissing! I’ll lay them out here so you don’t turn out to be someones worst kiss!!
Annabella said “I hate it when I need to catch a breathe and d partner doesn’t want that… he wants to continue kissing!”
Edith said “I find it annoying when the guy floods my mouth with saliva!”
Marilyn said “Bad Breathe kills the mood!”
According to Florence “When a guy keeps sucking my lower lip like there’s no where else to go makes kissing disgusting”
Evelyn said “I hate it when he bites my lips like he’s chewing his favourite meat”
So there you have it! What real people consider tha “donts” of kissing. This did not come from a textbook! Finally, don’t just let your hands hang at your sides like two limp fettucini noodles — put them to good use! Keep in mind that an awkward first kiss isn’t the end of the relationship (or the world). Actually, it can build intimacy through having a shared experience. As long as you can laugh it off, you’ll be fine.
The fact of the matter is if you do the right things or say the right stuff to him/her during the date, the kiss is guaranteed! Trust me, I know! I’ve been there! Unless your date is King Tsonga, ruler of Kuvukiland, you actually have a more than probable chance of closing your date with a successful kiss! Afterall he/she had to at least “like” something about you before agreeing to a date with you! So that should be a confidence booster! The remainder of how your date goes and ends determines if you’ll win the raffle! Ok… where do we start? We start from the beginning! Let your intentions be known from the onset.
Repeat the action innocently about 2 more times during the date! The date is progressing well and you are probably tired of licking your lips! What do you do now? Don’t forget that its a date and not just about kissing your date. If you turn the night into an obsession about kissing you’ll come off as another pervert! Keep the evening nice with conversation and jokes and then… If you’re feeling brave, test the waters with a small kiss on the hand or the cheek. If the other person seems interested, it’s probably safe to proceed with a kiss on the mouth. Stop it if the person draws away… you’ll probably face sexual harassment charges if you don’t! Now Guys, If you’re kissing a girl be sure to first take her hand and slowly lift it to your mouth. Gently press your lips into the back of your hand for 2 or 3 seconds! Girls , your job is to lean in and plant a 2- or 3-second kiss on his cheek. Keep your lips soft, and avoid puckering like you would if you were kissing a family member. If you want your intentions to be extra clear, aim for the part of his cheek just to the side of his lips! Your night is going good. You are almost there! What’s the next step? Simple! Don’t waste any time once you have the go-ahead — close your eyes, lean in and smooch! Or not! I was kidding about the closing your eyes part! Unless you have memorized the geography of her face ,don’t fly blind! You might land on unclaimed territory, say the nose! Or ran your fore head again hers- then what?! Say sorry?! Just keep your eyes open till you have a gentle but firm grip on her lips! Now smooch away!!!!
The article has ended. You’ve kissed! So why am I still writing… Its not over yet… I took the liberty of asking a few good friends what they hate most about kissing! I’ll lay them out here so you don’t turn out to be someones worst kiss!!
Annabella said “I hate it when I need to catch a breathe and d partner doesn’t want that… he wants to continue kissing!”
Edith said “I find it annoying when the guy floods my mouth with saliva!”
Marilyn said “Bad Breathe kills the mood!”
According to Florence “When a guy keeps sucking my lower lip like there’s no where else to go makes kissing disgusting”
Evelyn said “I hate it when he bites my lips like he’s chewing his favourite meat”
So there you have it! What real people consider tha “donts” of kissing. This did not come from a textbook! Finally, don’t just let your hands hang at your sides like two limp fettucini noodles — put them to good use! Keep in mind that an awkward first kiss isn’t the end of the relationship (or the world). Actually, it can build intimacy through having a shared experience. As long as you can laugh it off, you’ll be fine.
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